Children of Vietnam War Refugees Seek Reconciliation with Their Painful Past

Hanoi/Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam – Victoria Ngo, a child of war refugees, began to explore her Vietnamese identity during her college years in the United States in the 1990s. As the eldest daughter in a family with a Vietnamese father of Chinese descent, she grew up in a predominantly Chinese-speaking community and initially identified solely as Chinese.

However, as an inquisitive student, Ngo recognized differences between her Vietnamese experiences and those of her Chinese peers. This realization sparked her curiosity about her heritage, which was often met with silence from her parents when she sought information about Vietnam. Despite the linguistic and cultural influences of her upbringing, she embraced her Vietnamese roots, evidenced by her name and her familial history as a refugee.

Vietnam, however, was seldom discussed, particularly the war that culminated 50 years ago when Saigon fell to North Vietnamese forces. This silence highlights the complexities of identity within Vietnamese refugee communities, often characterized by an unwillingness to confront painful histories.

Ngo’s journey to understand her family’s past involved attending a college conference on the Vietnam War, an endeavor that evoked a stark reaction from her father. His strong disapproval reflected a common sentiment among many Vietnamese refugees, who often associate the South Vietnamese government with painful memories of war and division.

The fall of Saigon in 1975, while marking a unification of North and South, prompted many who had served in the US-aligned government to seek refuge abroad. For them, the choice of exile was preferable to adapting to a new socialist regime. This narrative resonates across generations, as many individuals grapple with the trauma and loss embedded in their family’s histories.

Today, many Vietnamese families carry a profound sense of loss regarding their past. The silence surrounding the war has led to gaps in understanding its implications, creating a void in the collective memory of the diaspora. This year, the 50th anniversary of the fall of Saigon serves as a poignant reminder of both trauma and resilience, celebrated by a vibrant and unifying Vietnam, now economically flourishing and open to reconciliation.

Seeking to fill this gap in her own narrative, Ngo has dedicated her career to public health, focusing on mental health support for underserved communities. Her path has enabled her to address the lingering impacts of trauma and displacement that resonate deeply within Vietnamese society today.

This complex tapestry of identity and history reflects the broader struggle to reconcile the narratives of those who left Vietnam with those who remained. As Vietnam celebrates its past and embraces a future rooted in unity, the experiences of the diaspora continue to inspire discussions about healing, resilience, and the importance of remembering history.

In navigating their heritage, both Ngo and fellow Vietnamese American poet Cat Nguyen highlight that the journey to reconciliation is multifaceted, asking for empathy and understanding toward all narratives—both North and South—within Vietnam’s rich historical context.

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